I’ve been thinking about burnout a lot lately.
Not because I want to go back there. But because now that I’ve had some distance from it, I can see things I couldn’t see while I was in the middle of it.
People often talk about burnout as though it’s a switch.
One day you’re fine.
The next day you’re burned out.
That’s not how it happened for me. Looking back, I can see a progression.
Nine stages.
They weren’t always obvious. Some overlapped. Some lasted much longer than others. And at the time, I didn’t recognize many of them for what they were.
But this is how I remember my journey.
Stage 1: The Excitement
It starts innocently.
You enjoy what you’re doing. You’re motivated. You want to prove yourself. You take on extra work because you can.
Working hard doesn’t feel like a problem.
It feels rewarding.
You tell yourself you’re ambitious.
Stage 2: The “I Can Handle It” Stage
The workload increases.
But instead of slowing down, you simply convince yourself that you can handle more.
Another project.
Another deadline.
Another late night.
You become proud of how much you can accomplish. Being busy becomes part of your identity.
Stage 3: The Normalization
Eventually, working late doesn’t feel unusual anymore.
Neither does checking email at night.
Or working on weekends.
Or answering messages when you’re supposed to be relaxing.
You stop noticing that your life has become almost entirely about work.
It has become normal.
Stage 4: The Irritation
Small things begin to bother you.
People asking questions. Meetings. Interruptions.
Things that wouldn’t have bothered you before suddenly become irritating.
You may not even realize why you’re becoming less patient.
You just know that everything seems harder than it should.
Stage 5: The Disconnection
This was a big one for me.
Things I normally enjoyed started feeling less interesting.
You stop looking forward to things.
You withdraw.
You have less energy for friends and family.
You are still functioning, but something inside you is slowly switching off.
Stage 6: The Exhaustion
Eventually, tired becomes your normal state.
You sleep but don’t feel rested.
You wake up already thinking about everything you have to do.
Your body is there. Your mind is there.
But neither seems to have much left to give.
Stage 7: The Questioning
This is when I started asking myself some uncomfortable questions.
“Why am I doing this?“
“What am I actually working toward?“
“Is this worth it?”
“What happened to the person I used to be?”
You begin questioning not just your job, but your entire direction.
Stage 8: The Breaking Point
Eventually, something has to give.
For me, it became impossible to pretend everything was fine.
The system had simply run out of capacity. I couldn’t keep adding more and expecting myself to somehow continue functioning.
Something had to change.
Stage 9: The Rebuilding
This is the stage nobody talks about enough. Burnout doesn’t end when you stop working.
That’s when the rebuilding begins.
You have to figure out who you are when productivity isn’t defining you.
You have to rediscover what gives you energy.
You have to reconnect with people.
You have to learn how to rest.
You have to ask yourself what kind of life you actually want.
For me, that rebuilding eventually led to travel, creativity, bubbles, writing, and ultimately standing on a Fringe stage telling my story.
Looking back, I don’t think burnout was one event. It was a journey.
And perhaps the most important lesson I’ve taken from it is that the earlier stages are warnings.
You don’t have to wait until Stage 8.
You don’t have to completely break before you give yourself permission to change direction.
Sometimes exhaustion is information.
I wish I had understood that earlier. Because burnout didn’t happen because I was weak. It happened because I ignored too many signals for too long.
And perhaps that’s why I’m writing about it now.
Not as an expert.
Not as someone who has the perfect formula.
But as someone who has been there.
These are my nine stages. According to me. Your stages may look completely different.
But if you recognize yourself somewhere along this road, maybe that’s the moment to stop and listen.
Before your mind and body have to shout.